Ficathon Entry: We've All Got Our Problems...

[Fantine]

Rating: PG

“Devon, I've got a problem."

“Oh, don't be so modest, my dear boy. You have a wide range of problems."



“Did you know Michael has been….dating a psychiatrist?” Bonnie asked Devon lightly, as she poured a cup of coffee in the rear of the semi.

“Really? That’s a rather drastic change from….” Devon grimaced. “Kelli.”

Bonnie twisted her face into a mockery of perkiness. “With an ‘I’!” She struck a cheerleader pose, before making a face.

“Quite.” Devon shuddered.

“No one ever accused Michael Knight of making sense. But apparently he’s quite taken with her. Dr. Gina Warren.”

“And your certain he’s seeing her and not seeing her.” Devon asked, causing Bonnie to snort into her coffee.

“I don’t even want to get into whether or not he’s paying for her services.”

“Bonnie!” Devon was clearly shocked to the core.

“And here he comes now.” Bonnie remarked, spotting Kitt’s familiar form heading towards them.

“I do hope this relationship won’t interfere with his work.” Devon muttered.

“Oh, when has Michael ever let a woman cloud his judgment or interfere with his job?”

“Good lord, either Kitt sounds a great deal like you, or you sound a great deal like Kitt…and I’m not sure which of the two is the least disturbing scenario to contemplate.” Devon said with a brief shake of his head as Kitt pulled up the ramp.

Michael slowly emerged from the driver’s seat. He looked troubled and was absentmindedly chewing on his lip.

“Is everything quite all right, my dear boy?” Devon asked.

Michael looked over at his boss with a frown. “Devon, I've got a problem."

Even Devon couldn’t let the opportunity slip by. “Oh, don't be so modest, my dear boy. You have a wide range of problems." Bonnie chuckled appreciatively.

But Michael merely looked morosely at Devon. “You don’t know how right you are.” He said sadly.

“Oh, not again Michael!” Kitt sounded beyond irritation. Devon had the oddest feeling he was observing the AI’s equivalent of an eye-roll as the scanner tracked back and forth rapidly.

“Gina says that I am suffering from a variety of psychological ailments.” Michael replied huffily.

“Gina saw you talking to your car and watch in the same afternoon.” Kitt pointed out.

“She said that was eccentric. As long as I didn’t expect a response.” Michael added.

“But…obviously you were expecting a response, since you were talking to me.”

“My interest is piqued.” Bonnie remarked, interrupting the partner’s bickering. “What exactly does she think your problem is?”

“Narcissistic Personality Disorder, for one.” Michael replied.

Bonnie eyed him critically. “Michael, you’re full of yourself…you do not have a psychological disorder.”

“Really he’s more of a carrier, I’d say.” Devon observed.

Ignoring the ribbing he was receiving Michael continued, “She also believes I might be slightly delusional. Although she maintains that a lot of people talk to their cars….she felt that naming them and calling them ‘buddy’ concerns her a bit.”

“You didn’t name me.”

“I know Kitt.”

“She also said it was a sign that I am not getting enough human contact. Lonely people tend to—“

“Dr. Warren dresses her Papillion in little outfits and carries it places in a baby snuggly. If you struck up a conversation with this semi, you’d still be much more normal in my book.” Kitt obviously had little love for Michael latest.

“She must not know you very well if she is concerned about the amount of human contact you’re getting.” Bonnie said witheringly.

“Bonnie!”

“I’m a little hurt by the lack of sympathy you all have been demonstrating towards my….conditions.” Michael did indeed look slightly wounded.

“Oh, really Michael.” Bonnie sniffed. “You’re a handsome, charming, and at times funny, if highly exasperating, man. If Gina is too busy analyzing you to see that, you could obviously do better.”

Devon looked incredulously at Bonnie. “Did you just…” he shook his head.

Michael turned a pair of soulful eyes on Bonnie. “Do you really think I could do better?” he asked pitifully.

“Yes! From what you two have described the woman sounds like a complete loon! You’d be hard pressed not to do better!” Bonnie threw up her hands, nearly spilling the remnants of her coffee.

“Would you like to go out for some dinner, then?”

“Wha—“

“You said I could do better…and I can’t think of anyone better than you.” Michael glanced at the semi floor. “Of course, I could always call Gina up one last time if you’re busy…”

You’ve been set up Bonnie. You walked right into it. Don’t do it….don’t be swayed by an obviously clever ruse, don’t—

“Seven.”

Michael staggered. “What?”

“I said seven. Pick me up at seven.” I’m such a patsy.

Devon hid a smile as Michael tried to save face. “Oh…well….great! That’s wonderful! I mean…sure, seven it is.” Michael stumbled backwards on his way back to Kitt. “I’ll see you at….er…what time was that, Kitt?”

A two second pause. “Seven.” Apparently the AI was no less dumbfounded than his driver.

“Yes! Seven!”

Bonnie watched as they pulled out and headed off into the distance. Before they quite vanished from sight, Michael apparently pulled an impromptu Turbo-boost, causing her to simultaneously grit her teeth and glance towards heaven with a sigh.

“I just hope I know what I’m getting myself into.”

[knightshade]

Awww. Cute.



“Really? That’s a rather drastic change from….” Devon grimaced. “Kelli.”
and

“Really he’s more of a carrier, I’d say.” Devon observed.

ROTFL! Between you and Mike there have been some great Devon one-liners in this ficathon.

[gumnut]

Oh, Fantine, you have so many excellent lines in this one i can just see the wounded puppy look in Michael's eyes And leaves me to wonder if Michael had rigged it or he was really seeing a psychiatrist

And I love Kitt's reaction. I suppose even AIs have their limits

Keep em comin' I need more fic.

Nutty
(who, somehow or other, has just been swallowed by the roleplaying monster)